Birthdays and Anniversaries

Hi all!

Hope you are all well! Again been a few weeks since I blogged, maybe I’m not very good at it but I do enjoy it when I do. Today I’d like to ask another question and then bore you rotten with my last few weekends.

Birthdays and Anniversaries for your nearest and dearest? Gifts or experiences?

I was always a gifts person but in recent years, mainly thanks to His Lordship, I have been converted. Gifts are nice if you really need or want something but what do you do for people that have everything or are difficult to buy for? Sometimes gifts are great but within a week you are bored with it, it will wear out in a few months or it just becomes something you have. I was one of these people who would shun experience days for the latest gadget or similar. My parents for example are very difficult to buy for. The older they get the harder it becomes, an Amazon voucher is great but gets predictable and Dad’s request for a new car can’t be fulfilled on my current income. Lol

So recently I treated my Mum to an experience day in London, taking a tour of the House of Parliament (an excellent tour and value for money if you get the chance) and finishing with Afternoon Tea at The Dorchester. We all had a lovely day, His Lordship treated his mother so we all went, and am sure it will never be forgotten. The nicest thing of all was that the hotel had catered for my parents diabetes perfectly with their own specially made cakes that they could enjoy without lapsing into a coma. Lol.

To continue the experience day theme, His Lordship and my birthdays are only a week apart so for an extra treat this year we had 2 weekends away in posh hotels. First was his birthday and we stayed in a nice hotel in Windsor, took in the wonderful castle and enjoyed a nice day with meal and drinks and sadly an uncomfortable nights sleep (you can’t have everything).

The next weekend was my birthday and he took me to London. We climbed the O2 Arena, huge amount of fun and just missed all the rain. This was followed by a fabulous meal at the Kensington Roof Gardens, expensive but as a rather treat, totally justifiable. What more could a gay ask for? Lol

I know that I will never forget these days out for both of us and our parents. So the more I think about it the more I think that experiences are so much more to cherish than a gift or item that is bought. More often than not the things that are bought for me are clothes that wear out or electrical items that break or you just ‘have’. The photos taken will always be there to remind me of our days and the memories will be with long after and will not wear out or break.

Consider me a convert? You?

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Weighty issues

Hi all,

It’s been a while since I have blogged anything. Lots has been happening and maybe that is for another blog on a another day.

Today I want to talk about a something which causes me a lot of…I don’t know what to call it. Pain, emotional discomfort, a confidence destroyer. FAT! I know some out there might say just shut up moaning and go on a diet. I counter this, food, for me is an addiction. It is my comfort, when some people might go for the bottle of wine or Vodka or the pack of fags or drugs, I go for food.

We all know how hard it is for smokers and alcoholics to break their habits and give up their vices. Drug addicts have the hardest time of all with their addictions. I wonder why do people not see why some people suffer from addictions to food. Is this something that should be taken seriously?

I am now going to contradict myself, please stick with me. I’m not talking about the psychology that the big food companies and supermarkets employ to get you to buy their foods and in some ways I do believe you can be addicted to the highs that some foods can give you. Let’s take one thing, in the UK the big supermarkets are always giving good deals on foods but what are these foods, they are not the healthy alternatives they are the bad foods, the chocolate, biscuits and pizza. This is another issue but then the food is cheap and makes you feel good is it not easy to see why you might become addicted to it. If it we’re expensive and hard to come by then maybe it would be as it used to be when I was a kid and an occasional treat. By occasional I mean once a week if that. Nt a daily treat. This is another issue maybe for later on.

My weight has always been going up and down. I’m not hugely over weight, by my workings out I’m about 2.5 stones over weight. I have lost this weight and been down to my ideal weight on a few occasions but the weight just seems to come back on. Last year I lost all this weight before my holiday and since the I have put it all back on. It’s the vicious cycle of when you are down or tried you reach for the chocolate and biscuits you feel good then bad and think fuck it. I wish it was the fogs or the booze maybe I wouldn’t hate myself they way I do for being so weak.

Yes, I hate myself for my weak will when it comes to food. I know I can do it, I have done it many times before so why do I give in. Is there something in me that is so dark that it makes me reach for the food rather than confront it. Is that why I am sitting in today and not going out because I’m so self conscious about my body shape I don’t want people to look at me. Yet at the same time all I want to do is goo in the kitchen and find something to eat to make me feel better. This is something to fight but I keep losing. Why? I have been known to sit an cry over my weight even though it is nowhere nearer as bad as many other ps with real problems but it is all relative.

I’m sorry for going on but in a way putting it out there is a way of confronting the demon inside. Some will think that this isn’t a problem well maybe your right for yourself but don’t judge other on your own experiences and personality, for some this is a real problem.

Hopefully next blog will be a little more light hearted.

Si